H,
It is possible and now desirable that we get comfortable in our own
skin. You only have yourself. As the poet said: all that you have is your soul.
It is important that you spend some time tending to it. We cannot ignore the
deep cuts and woolly nature of our hurts. There might not be an easy
resolution, but at least let us admit that we are wounded.
If we are too easy on ourselves, if we let things slide and let forgiveness
reign over our foibles, then we must remember to give this same levity to
others. We must remember to give this same grace to others. This will tell us
much about our own behaviour. There is nothing that can teach us more about our
conduct than being on the receiving end of the same darn thing. When we have to
forgive these high crimes from others, we will learn the high cost of our own
insolence.
Yet, let us remember, again, that we are only captains of this ship we
call a soul. Our choices are ours alone and their consequences must be seen in
the light of this: we must take responsibility for our conduct. Grace allows us
to realize this, to learn this in the light and to become the sort of people we
would like to love.