H,     
It has to be presented for
the joyous thing that it is. Despite the way I make it sound, it is true
happiness and not in the sense of holding back, or finding places to run to or
forgetting yourself so you can forget the pain of self but in the real idea of
growth from seed to plant to fruit bearing tree. The real idea of full lives
living out their fullness in every sense.
It cannot be merely one
thing it has to be everything. This does not mean you will only laugh but it
does mean that your tears will mean something. They will be counted. It does
not mean that you will not have trouble. To the contrary, going straight on
anything will face many bends. It means that you will overcome your troubles. It
does not mean that you will not have doubts and fears and setbacks. It does
mean that at the tail end of all that, you will see God, face to face.
It is all about, in the end,
the direction you are walking and the sort of person you are growing into. These
are all markers only you and God can see. It is not for the pressing crowd or
the circle of grace you may or may not be putting up a show for. You know where
you are today. You know your very soul and where it is going and growing
towards.
I suspect, also, you know
what you need to do about it.