M,
It is upon us now. The years of planting and now the first bud of this tree we are building will now be visible to all. Sometimes, I forget to be excited. I forget this is all joy. I focus on the outcome and since the outcome is mostly beyond me, I am afraid of it. I have to tell myself to be calm. I have to tell myself to en-joy the moments. I have to look at the sun and not the ground.
There is no real failure. Only the things we chose not to do again out of fear or pride or both in an inequal mix. The necessary learning that is wisdom comes at the expense of our first ideas about ourselves, about our control over things and about the plan we have to build the world around us. The thing that comes next is the best part. We will learn everything we need. Fear will recede. We will find our way through shaky steps and into that confident work. We just have to start. Even with the fear. It is just a companion. He will not travel long.